Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Spoiler Alert!!! Shocking developments!!!

And last night was just a laugh a minute!  The much anticipated scandal episode.  I'll get to all that later.  

Starting with the first group date - the girls got to be in an InStyle photo shoot that ends up in the magazine.  Some are professional models (Rozlyn, Gia), others are more natural models (Ashleigh) others just freak out (Christina).  Rozlyn was first and knocked it out of the park, of course, except for the part where she flashed her "cha-cha."  Gia was just stunning, I think she is the most beautiful girl there.  I felt really bad for Christina and Jake did a great job helping her work out her nerves.  Unfortunately, she had too much to drink and ruined her chances for a rose.  And...Ashleigh, um, Slut City called...they want their mascot back!  Breaking in on someone else's one-on-one time in a teeny weeny bikini is just plain slutty, besides the fact that you then wrapped your legs around him in the pool - icky!!!  Rozlyn was a little less forward...NOT!  When she went in for the kiss up on the roof she should have just strapped on her mask and flippers since she dove in head first!  It looked to me like he wiped his face off before he excused himself - did any one else notice that?  I also hated how she kept talking about winning - while I agree this is a competition between 25 woman, it should be about falling in love for the right reasons, not about winning.  Just sayin'.  But, she got the date rose anyway.  Boo, Jake, bad instincts. 

I was so happy when Ali got the one-on-one date.  I liked her from the moment she got out of the limo.  She does just seem so genuine.  I loved how every time Jake would walk she would have to take two or three steps to his one - especially when they were running across the field to the Chicago concert.  I think she will go far, but if they play "On the Wings of Love" one more time, I might puke in my mandatory Bachelor glass of wine.

Now, on to the crazy...Michelle.  Period.  That girl is twenty ways to crazy.  I think she might even be crazier than Shannon, the tooth Nazi.  Besides the fact that she is immature and throws a temper tantrum when she doesn't get a date, she turns on and off like a switch.  Talk about fake - at the cocktail party, one minute she is telling the other girls that if he doesn't talk to her, she is leaving, and the next minute she is gushing to him about how great she is doing tonight!  Ed was right - unstable!!!

And on to the next group date...Six Flags?  OK, whatever.  Nothing says I love you like getting sick on a roller coaster.  Elizabeth brought the crazy when she took Jake aside and read him a prepared statement basically saying that she wouldn't share his lips with anyone.  Um, have you not seen the Bachelor before?  That is all they do is share lips with everyone!  The Chapstick people are making a fortune off these kiss-a-holics!  I didn't think he would buy into it, but I forgot for a minute that he's a man.  Men love a good challenge and Elizabeth threw down the gauntlet.  Just try and kiss me!  She's a huge tease if you ask me (which you didn't, but oh, well).  But it worked and she got the date rose.  I really can't find anything redeeming about Vienna.  Her "huge" confession was that she is impetuous and immature!  Wow!  Stop the presses, break into local programming.  A 20-something self-professed Daddy's girl is impetuous and immature?  Now that is breaking news!  Whatever...

On to the cocktail party and all the drama.  The rumors about this are swirling over the internet and you can read them anywhere.  "Reality" is somewhere in there but I doubt we will ever know the full truth.  Rozlyn was politely and awkwardly asked to leave by poor, uncomfortable Chris Harrison after he explained to her that an "inappropriate relationship" had taken place between she and a staffer.  The staffer was no longer with "us" and she would have to pack her bags and leave immediately.  While Rozlyn didn't seem surprised when Chris told her she was leaving, she did say that her personal life was no one's business.  Of course, sweetie, I'm sorry but didn't you sign up to have your personal life broadcast to millions of people?  I would like ABC to define "inappropriate" because they are leaving it wide open for interpretation.  At the very least, I hope that they tell Jake exactly what the inappropriateness was so that he can move on without any issues.  So, dramatic, to say the least, I thought Jake was pretty cool headed and I loved it when he said, "Can I have my rose back?"

Roses go to:  Ali, Elizabeth, Vienna, Gia, Tenley, Ella, Valicia, Corrie, Jessica, Ashleigh, Michelle (felt the breeze of her exhale from here), and Katherine.

No roses for:  Christina and Ashley

Next week:  Another shocking exit?!?!?!

Two side notes:  

1.  I am lovin' the purple walls in the girls' living room.  Does anyone think Bubba would let me paint something that color?

2.  I can't wait to go see "The Rock" in Tooth Fairy!   

Oh, and by the way, are you ready?!?!?!?


SupahMommy said...

wheezer we are all smack talking without you on email re: survivor!

it's your turn to choose! The natives are busy practicing lighting fires and eating roaches.


Lisa said...

Wheezer!!! Where are you????

*eating roaches?* :I

Under the Influence said...

Check out Reality Steve if you want the full scoop - including who gets the final rose. I have been reading him for some time and he is ALWAYS right, thanks to his unnamed sources.

♥Georgie♥ said...

i always love your bach recaps!

kanishk said...

i hope you and your family have a great 2010!

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