Tuesday, January 5, 2010

It will be the most AMAZING SEASON EVER!!!

Ok, I watched, but with one eye closed.  I have to admit that Jake is adorable.  I'm not so keen on the blatant Top Gun references in the beginning montage - um, ABC, 1986 called, they want their movie back!  Well, Jake is kind of short so that would translate to a Tom Cruise reference.  Anyway, on to the crazy...

I have to start with Vienna.  Her bio at the beginning set her up as the most shallow contestant ever!  She is a self-professed "Daddy's girl", terrible driver (um - 8 cars?), princess who is loves herself.  She goes on dates with her teacup chihuahua that she dresses in matching clothing.  'Nuff said.  He'll keep her around for the entertainment value alone.

Then there is Christina.  She describes herself as a boy's girl and needs practice with small talk with women.  Um, if you told me you liked my shoes, I would think you were brainless.  Listen, I am a shoe whore, but I don't use shoes as small talk.  Everyone on this show is always accusing people of being fake and here you are practicing it!  If you are a boy's girl, Jake will appreciate you for that and either like you for it or not.  Quit pretending.  Oh, and the parting gift, jelly bean thing...bad, bad, bad.

On to who may be the craziest contestant ever and not because she spoke to him in a foreign language.  It was what she said.  After reeling off a string of Cambodian and Jake saying that it was beautiful, she told him that it meant that he could "land his plane on her landing strip."  Whoa!  This one goes high on the TMI list.  Not only did she invite him to do the horizontal bop, but she also revealed her grooming habits to millions of people!  And Jake promptly said, "No rose for you!"

Now on to the favorites...

My favorite so far has to be Ali.  She is cute, she seems grounded, and she had the flu/laryngitis and still managed to look stunning.     The peacock feather was cute, but may have been cuter if she had kept it since it is how peacocks attract a mate - Jake doesn't need the help, he has 25 women falling over themselves to date him.

Speaking of falling, I've got to give props to Ashleigh.  She claims that her fall was faked but if you watch it back, she is either the best at pratfalls since Dick Van Dyke or she really wasn't faking.  Nice touch!

I did like Valishia's Texas dirt stunt - kind of sweet.  It obviously worked because she got a rose.

In the teaser for next week's episode, there is a scandal on the way.  I have heard rumors that one bachelorette has an "improper" relationship with a producer and that gets both of them booted from the show.  Tune in...this just might be the most AMAZING SEASON EVER!!!


Ali said...

I'm going to steer clear of this one--I have too many shows to catch up on already!

oliveoyl64 said...

I wasn't planning to watch this season, but I know I will get roped in by all the drama.

Your recaps are always entertaining, so even if I do watch I will come check out your recap.

Under the Influence said...

What about that wack-a-do, Michelle? I think that is her name. The one who cried because she wasn't getting one on one time and then she finally went to talk to him and was all emotional. I think that's another one that is going to be around for entertainment value!